What a Week…

I’ve been doing this for weeks now, but seriously… I am so sorry I haven’t been posting anything but giveaways and WWDP posts. It’s been a long few weeks, I’m nauseous 24/7, J has been working nonstop and it feels like he is never home. But what I really wanted to post about today was my first prenatal appointment.

We decided to try a different midwifery office, if you have been reading my blog for a while, you may remember some of the reasons we decided to do this this time. The midwives I used for Boogie and Bubby are FANTASTIC, I adore them. However, due to insurance policies and such they are only available and on call during business hours. It’s a long story and such, but despite loving them I was hoping that this other midwifery office could be a good replacement so that I COULD have a midwife no matter what.

Well, we went to the appointment yesterday… and immediately J was uncomfortable. I consider us to be semi-crunchy, we cloth diaper, eat as much organic and un-processed foods as possible, breastfeed, etc etc. This office was super-crunchy “esque” in my opinion, I’m trying really hard to write this without sounding judgmental, but I’m finding it hard to describe it without doing so.

The receptionist was so kind, she was warm and welcoming and I genuinely liked her. I had a long wait, they asked me to come early to fill out paperwork, but I should have known better…. I can do that fairly quickly. So 10 minutes doing that, with a 50 minute wait until my appointment. The midwife was nice, but very awkward and just something about her made me feel very uncomfortable. She went over my history, and apparently didn’t look at my file prior to the appointment because she was super surprised that I had two other children. It took her a bit to find the baby’s heartbeat (it was 160bpm, so despite a crappy appointment, at least we got to hear a strong heartbeat!) and instead of a nurse or phlebotomist doing my bloodwork like I’m used to at the old office, she did…. and holy moly. She was far from gentle… I’ve never had a blood draw hurt like that one did!

After the appointment I went to sign out and was hit with a “payment plan” set up discussion, remember when I mentioned the insurance stuff with my original midwives? Well if I wanted this new office to have a midwife with me at all times during my labor… I would need to fork out $400 by July to do so. Talk about a weight of bricks… thank you insurance for not covering midwives completely.

So… I think the both of us, J and I, knew this just wasn’t the right fit from us. Nothing about the appointment felt right, we didn’t get a dating ultrasound like we are used too. And believe me, I know that’s not necessary, however with the way my cycles are never the same length, and with us only having 1 “normal” cycle since my first postpartum cycle… I feel it’s important to have one between 8-10 weeks for dating purposes. I wouldn’t want to be “overdue” and come to find out I’m only 36-37 weeks. And for me… it’s peace of mind. SEEING that sweet baby, SEEING the heartbeat, it just gives you a jumpstart into your whole pregnancy.

This morning I called to set up my appointment with my original midwives, and unfortunately they can’t see me until the end of the month. I’m frustrated with myself for going through all of this and not being able to be seen earlier. It shouldn’t be a big deal, and I’m sure my hormones are making it that much worse… but yea. I’m frustrated and sad…. please pray that my anxiety and stress levels go down, that this sweet little bean stays happy and healthy and that we get to see a strong and beautiful heart beat at the end of the month.

Thank you for reading, thank you for being a Mustard Seed Mommy fan… you are loved!