Struggling

I’m struggling tonight… to be content, thankful, calm, but most of all… I’m struggling to find understanding. I feel a little lost. I feel a lot lost actually. I feel alone, even though I know my Father is just a breathe away… I feel deserted by family and even a few friends. I feel forgotten. I feel abused. I feel… taken advantage of. I feel pushed aside… I can’t even describe to you all the feelings I’m feeling… it’s devastating and exhausting. I’m really just at a loss. What now Lord? What’s next?